Bullying, it’s a bad thing!

Posted April 14, 2016 by FMA in My letters to you, Special Post

No-Bullying

I contemplated whether or not to make this post. Because what happened this week, wasn’t directly related to me and I questioned, was it better to let things lie and not keep the issue riled?

But I think it’s important that we remember bullying, in any form, is not okay.

verb
gerund or present participle: bullying
  1. use superior strength or influence to intimidate (someone), typically to force him or her to do what one wants.
    “a local man was bullied into helping them”

This week an author took aim at a blogger because of a 2.5 star Goodreads review. Being upset about what someone wrote about her book is her prerogative. It is the actions that followed that caused the issue with many readers, bloggers and authors alike. The author in question took to her facebook group and asked them if they can “flag that bitch” as the author believed the blogger had “lost sight of what fiction and nonfiction was”. As well, this author believed, the bloggers review was bashing. (Again, totally within the rights of the author to believe so. Just as you can believe the sky is pea green while I believe it is blue, perception is totally subjective.)

This started a firestorm of reactions. This author’s supporters took umbrage over the content of the review, debating it’s worth and validity within the Goodreads review comments section. And in some instances, even attacking the reviewer herself. What started out as 48 likes, quickly jumped to over 950, as friends and followers of the blogger, rallied to her defense.

  1. What to do if someone is being bullied.

“Speak up if you hear others are being bullied. Stand up for her by telling them [the bully] that the way they’re treating her is wrong and what they’re doing is not funny.”

The author responded as well, in her Facebook group, to a graphic post regarding the bloggers lack of sense of humor. Thus, further enraging the friends and followers of the blogger and the blogging community.

I want to be clear here. I do not condone bullying. In any form. Not Author to Blogger, nor Blogger to Author. Words hurt. Just the same, I believe negative reviews need to be written. But, I believe they need to be written consciously with a respectful tone, as I do believe this one was. We are adults. We need to act like we are. As such, we are held to a high standard. We teach our children to do to others what you would have them do to you.

When we lash out at others because our feelings are hurt and we get others to back us up and do the same, what are we solving? Tit for Tat? What is that? How does that help? Take a deep breath. Take a few days. Think on it. Clarity comes when the emotions calm.

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What Can We Take Away From This?

The Other Side

I think it is important to remember, we do not get a free pass because we are hiding behind the wall of the internet. Just because no one can see you, does not mean they cannot hear you. While I do not believe this particular blogger was “bashing” the author in her review, it does happen, and I have read my share of very nasty reviews and posts on social media. Remember, your words are all we have to judge you by. Words are your image. (Or in this case, they are the livelihood of the author.) Your reputation is everything in this business. And Blogging is a business. Believe it or not, even if you are not being paid, and as bloggers we are not. We work. For Free. Hours upon hours a week. For Free. Because we want to. Because we LOVE it.

Likewise, authors, please remember, bloggers are readers, first and foremost. For free, we promote your books, via fan-made graphic teasers, cover reveals, blitz’s, blog tours and reviews or simply on our own because as mentioned, we love to.

Sometimes we are given an ARC and sometimes we are not, we read your books because we love to read. If I did not love your book, please do not take it personally. It is nothing against you! There was just something about it that didn’t click for me. I promise I am not bashing you. I don’t know you.

Lastly, to anyone who has gotten through this lengthy post, thank you! Thank you for following, friending me and reading my reviews, posts and ramblings. I hope you enter the giveaways on here (and Facebook) and hopefully have won one or a few.

Wishing you peace and happiness!

Angela!

 

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